Highs and Lows

 

I had one of those nights when I really wasn't feeling great. I wrote a little something that helped me feel better. I wanted to share it accompanied by a piece that I wrote when I was feeling really really great. The time hasn't quite come yet, but I still wanted to share. So I share this with a promise that I will write a little something next time I'm feeling just swell. 

Here it is: 

You ever have those days when you think, “wow, there are a lot of things not going super well right now” and then two weeks after said date you think “wow things were so good two weeks ago.”

I’ve been experiencing such times. 

Tonight I just had it. I’ve been so numb to so many things and I guess the numbness finally wore off and I just let the tears flow. When this happens, I try to remind myself of all the things that I love about life. All of the reasons why it is good to continue to pursue. Here is tonight’s list of things that make life worth it:

1. the view of the skyline from the reservoir 
2. art
3. theatre
4. singing
5. that painting of trees I did a few years ago
6. kissing
7. chocolate
8. when you finally figure something out
9. giving advice
10. fried chicken
11. when the beat drops
12. dancing 
13. flowers 
14. holding hands
15. The Newsroom
16. acting
17. Les Misérables 
18. thunderstorms 
19. finishing something hard 
20. laughing 

There’s more, but 20 felt right. 

Sometimes it’s good to address the pain and sometimes I just need to distract myself with some things that are good.  

Dark nights do end. They have to. I have to believe that they do. I also absolutely believe that even when a lot of things are dark, you can still find little bursts of sunshine here and there. They don’t solve your problems, but they distract you really well and remind you that life isn’t actually all about your problems. The world keeps turning and you can choose to participate or you can wallow over how ________ is so unfair and not right and probably have a super compelling case. And you wouldn’t be wrong. And honestly, some nights that is the path that I chose. Other nights I let myself forget my pain and enjoy the things that remain to be good. 

So I’m going to keep building that list and finding more ways to incorporate such joy-sparkers into my life. 

xo
Rebecca