It will work

When I hear bad news, I accept it in phases. And by phases, I mean that at first—I do not accept the news. I assume an error must have occurred, or I genuinely believe I'm in the middle of a bad dream. As time passes (and I don't wake up), I start to think, "Okay, so what does life with [insert challenge] look like for me?" Then I slowly but surely move forward. 

Recently I was working on a project at work and kept hitting a wall. I didn't let the wall bother me—I just thought "Well this will work because it has to," and I kept going. And you know what? It worked. 

Aha. This is interesting. Instead of living in the unknown of "Will it work out?" or "What happens if I can't get this?" or "What else can I do besides this?" etc. etc., I just accepted as fact that it would work out, then I figured out a way to make it so. This mindset forces me to be a creative problem-solver. 

I'm going to make the bold claim (on this very blog—I know, I know) that my most successful achievements thus far stemmed from this very attitude. I didn't ask myself, "Will it work?" I just decided that it would and put in the work to make it a reality. 

Recently, I spoke with a friend about how he loves to dream. I agreed but clarified that I especially like to dream about things that I can make happen. Those are the types of things that I can approach with this "it will work" attitude. It's much more painful to dream dreams that require some sort of miracle to come true— though those are often the most tempting. 

There are times when I truly believed it would work, and it didn't. Those are often followed by periods of self-doubt. I'm annoyed with myself for lying to myself. I said I would make it happen, and I didn't. I believed in a reality that I couldn't deliver.  

Interesting. Interesting that the thought pattern that has enabled me to achieve so much and strengthened me to endure the *worst* of times is the very thought pattern that I get angry with when it doesn't pull through. And I'm not just angry, I'm embarrassed. I can't believe that I actually thought I could make [insert whatever] happen. 

I think if this were a typical self-help-type-of-thing, I would say something like "Then I realized, I'm asking the wrong question. It's not 'How can I make it happen?' it's 'What can I learn from the journey?'"

But this is not that. 

I often think I can do more than I actually can. I think that's a cool characteristic. Yes, sometimes it lets me down, but I think it pulls through more than it doesn't! There are a lot of people I never would have met, a lot of experiences I never could have lived, and a lot of lessons I never could have learned if I wasn't a little bit ignorant about my actual capabilities. My default attitude to believe I can "make things happen" continues to serve me whenever I am faced with another battle. 

Would I rather the opposite? Would I rather approach hard things thinking, "Yeah, there's no way you can handle that." 

Nope. (and you thought that question was rhetorical ;)

Cheers to trying and believing it can be. 

R